Living in my head can be a chaotic mess. I am constantly looking at the inter weavings of everyday life and thinking of how to use what's available to create different worlds- obsessively driven to bring these ideas into contextual form. But when the scale of what I'm dreaming and the reality of the constraints presented collide, I'm left feeling raw and fearfully seen. I know that my ideas fall short on the (self)funding side, which puts me in an unwanted position of being the bottleneck of several jobs and feeling like both the source of inspiration and stagnation. Universe please send money so I can hire a team.
Although I feel secure in being a working rough draft, I'm usually scared shitless in the process, and the creation of PeculiariTEASE had me in a weird state of calming terror. I felt like both a veteran of burlesque producing in San Diego, and an imposter compelled to try something new.
Half of producing is rolling with the punches. You plan for the best, but know how to swerve and recover if you need to. While producing PeculiariTEASE the variables did what they do, and I prepared as best as I could while exercising moments of letting go. Even in the chaos I felt confident in my ability to make whatever magic necessary happen to bring the show to life. If you were at the show and heard me on the mic, then you already know.
I worked with SoulAblaze in the creation of the intro song that I sang onstage, another first(s). I wrote the lyrics, then together as Verdell worked his magic we came up with something fun and peculiar that could open the show.
Moxxi Bustion, Mango Rava, Della Limonchella and Carly Cointreaux pose with the tentacle monster.
The photo booth set up happened with help from my friends Richard and Diana. Using resources we had between the two of us plus a hefty amount of Mod Podge, the tentacle monster was born.
Our cast was fantastic! I was so excited to see this group of artists work together and watch the alchemy of their arts emerge from the Portal of Sleaze. The best part was seeing the audience get to experience them all as a collective in this underground pop-up burlesque experience. It was like getting ushered into a secret tent at the circus only to have your mind blown away by the unexpected.
Moxxi Bustion had everyone literally howlin'. Carly Cointreaux gave us a sexy angst fueled chair dance. Vivvi The Force served the peppermint fashion fuck fest we all needed. J Starlit Writer walked us through the peculiarities of the San Diego dating scene. Holly Quinn showed us musicality in a limber way. Greta Garter blended the feminine with Chop Suey and I did a little stand up bit that was "accidentally" interrupted by a bell booty reindeer, aka my Whiskey & Fuego co-producer and wifey, Ginger N. Whiskey.
Our audience members were rockstars. They joined us in Ocean Beach, on a Sunday, at 2:30PM, and had blind faith in purchasing tickets for this show. They exuded show must go on energy! I am so grateful for all of the support and encouragement received around this show.
Before Christina Liu of The Lonely Eyelid (@thelonelyeyelid) sent me these images of the show, I was having a bit of a shame spiral surrounding my presentation of everything. I was overthinking and worried I was messy, indirect and ill-received. Low and still catching up on rest, the discomfort of my vulnerability made me want to crawl out of my skin, but then Christina sent these over.
I went from holding my breath as my phone loaded the link, to relaxing into a smile while swiping through captured show images. Christina's lens matched PeculiariTEASE's showmanship vibes perfectly and I got to see the show with love through her eyes. The Lonely Eyelid is a San Diego treasure. Hire them kindly.
I had many people tell me that I have to keep this thing going, and I'm compelled to agree with them. San Diego needs to get weird, so we are going to keep doing this thing, and it's only going to continue to grow and get better.
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Thank you babes and Stay Feisty!
Space Connect San Diego
Production PeculiariTEASE December 17, 2023